I know I will always be miserable if I return to my eating disorder.
Right now, recovery is miserable.
But, there a possibility that in the future recovery will bring me something better than my current misery.
The choice is between a certain misery and a potentially temporary misery, and the choice seems like an easy one to me.
In all honesty, sometimes I don’t believe in recovery. But I know at least that if I do pick recovery than there is a possibility that things will improve.
I’m fighting for the possibility that things will improve.